Naming My Son

by Anne Kirby Chelius

“What name are you giving him?”, the startled and disapproving hospital data gatherer asks.

“Geronimo”, I calmly reply.

She in turn tells me to think it over and she will be back the next day.

Within an hour a nurse appears worriedly inquiring about the name she “thought” she had been told. When I tell her that the name needs to begin with a G – she whips out a baby name book and stolidly informs me that there are three pages of G names for boys.

The next morning arrives and I have yet to change my mind.

I waver when they sic the Pediatrician on me. He sternly informs me that he is tired of parents naming their kid something that they think is cute and then the child is branded with this name for life.

My voluminous belly has been referred to as Geronimo for months by both my husband and the three kids at home. But “they” – the knowledgeable professionals - have convinced me that I am making some grave and serious mistake.

What to name him? He was born on Christmas Eve – so while gazing at a game I noticed it was made by Gabriel. Hmm! Gabriel was a Christmas Angel – we have a Genevieve already - -so how about a nice French sounding name – Gabriel Andre.

That finally passed muster.

However, no one seemed to accept this given name – except for his two grandmothers.

When he was about three – we lost him in FAO Schwartz. Finally, this frantic parent heard a page that informed the shoppers that a blonde, blue eyed boy wearing a Giants jacket was in the customer service area. I made a bee line towards it and upon spotting him called out, “Geronimo!” The one clerk nudged the other saying, “I told you that was what he said his name was!”

Geronimo has been Geronimo for 25 years. In elementary school he insisted that was his name. When he began Junior High and the teacher read off the attendance – he informed her that his name was Geronimo not Gabriel. She accused him of being a smart alec. However, the other kids defended him assuring the teacher that is what he has always been called. However, when she called the next kid – he informed her that his name was Sitting Bull. That got both of them sent to the office.

Going through life as Geronimo has not proven to be detrimental at all. Kids on any team that he ever played always would say that they were on “Geronimo’s team”. As he got older and played interscholastic sports – he was always remembered.

The perk that he enjoys the most is people don’t forget him. In bars, people he does not know or remember buy him drinks. Noone ever forgets his name.

Upon graduating from college - -an Ivy League Institution no less, he convinced them to put Geronimo on his diploma since that is all he is known by. His diploma reads, Gabriel “Geronimo” Chelius.

However, the name did, I guess, affect him in some ways. With a year until Graduation from Cornell – he decided he needed to canoe across America.

This created havoc in the family. His father wanted him to graduate first.

My feeling was if he waited until then – when would this trip end? Better, I thought, to give it a six month time frame. He embarked on his journey beginning in the Great Lakes and made it as far as the Mississippi River.

I guess he has some Early American spirit in him. On his canoe trip – at night he slept on the rive bank or on a Town Dock. I told him I felt like he was practicing being homeless.

Dress and personal hygiene are not high on his list. He lets his hair grow until it is annoying and then shaves his head. Shaving is accomplished rather sporadically.

He is happily employed making sails for a local sailmaker. He is in his element – he goes off to work in flip flops and shorts.

He does, I feel, drink too much-=- did his name cause that?

What will be interesting is if a Geronimo Jr. ever appears!

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